i'm not feeling well

Today is Sunday.

I still got nothing to do. I went to get back my stuff this morning and went to swim this afternoon. That's all i can talk about my day.

I am pretty alone all the times.
I try to get used to that.
I try to be happy with that.
I try to look at what the others are doing...

I just cannot find the answer...
I am having a headache at this moment, and I am really afraid i cannot live as long as i expect. I still got a lot to experience and enjoy, or even suffering.
God help me. I cannot even figure out that i am feeling sad or not.
I try to be positive all the times.
Maybe, I am just too free.
Maybe, i am just giving myself a too much higher standard to achieve...